People with addictions never feel they are enough. They feel disconnected, fearful, and struggle with what’s called ‘Learnt Helplessness’
Learnt Helplessness are encoding’s in their minds from their informative years.
An example of Learnt Helplessness is a child learning in their developmental years between ages 0-7 that it’s not alright to have feelings and emotions, to be heard., or even stand up for themselves.
Teaching the child that love, respect, being heard, and having their needs met is not available to them. Hence the Learnt Helplessness.
The child then begins to learn that there must be something wrong with them as they are failing to get love and their needs met by their parents/care giver. Which the child needs for their survival.
The child then begins to mentally and emotionally wither and the belief that there must be something wrong with them then turns into believing ‘ I am bad’ and ‘ I am unlovable’. Which goes on to them believing ‘ I should be punished’ and ‘ I should punish myself’.
Not only this the child also learns ‘people aren’t there for you’ and ‘ you can’t trust people’. And so the child shuts down and begins to isolate themselves.
These beliefs have now become the child’s hardwired programming which they carry with them into adulthood. Playing these recordings over and over again in their minds. Effecting there everyday life and the ability to deal with situations similar to their unresolved Learnt Helplessness in childhood.
Leading the person as a adult into needing therapy and/or even forming an addiction so as to try to regain control of that sense of helplessness to avoid and move them away from their pain (eg. stress, anxiety, depression) and towards pleasure ( eg. happiness, calmer). Or even to avoid themselves having a complete nervous breakdown.
The addiction becomes their way out and a way to feel connected again. Which sadly will only ever always be a temporary fix, and once the addiction becomes a part of a coping mechanism it becomes a problem.
This is where Therapy with myself comes in. It works really well with helping people with addiction. Especially when the person is ready to change what they attach pleasure and pain to.
Our minds are designed to move us towards pleasure and away from pain, so if you believe your addiction gives you pleasure and being without your addiction will cause you pain, then you will struggle to stop your addiction. And it’s only when your addiction causes you more pain than pleasure that you will create new habits and then the addiction stops.
Addictions come in many forms, such as, shopping, sex, social media, alcohol, drugs, gambling, food, computer games, pornography, workaholics.
No matter what the addiction is it has a role, function and purpose in the person’s life such as helping them to numb from their emotions and feelings and avoid pain, and always move the person towards pleasure instead.
For example the addiction of comfort eating distracts, suppresses and dulls undealt emotions allowing the person to avoid pain.
Workaholics constantly keep busy to distract themselves from their reality and to give themselves a sense of pleasure, purpose, and a feeling of being whole.
All addictions are simply habits of action run by habits of thought. So someone who really wants to be free of their addiction needs to change not just their habit but also their habit of thought. Resulting in their addiction stopping.
Therapy with myself will get to the root cause of the addiction.
Are You:-
- Ready to take back control of your own life
- Ready to change & live without your addiction
- Suffering with health issues due to your addiction
- Getting into debt due to your addiction
- Destroying your relationships with your partner/friends/family members due to your addiction
- Lonely
- Unhappy/depressed
- Anxious
- Ready to connect again
- Running from & avoiding your feelings & emotions
“To succeed at anything you need to make the unfamiliar familiar, and the familiar unfamiliar”
“Your mind cannot hold conflicting beliefs”
“Your minds job is to take you towards pleasure & away from pain”